But I want the answer NOW!

In my most recent class, I had several BIG personalities in my room.  I only had 8 students, so those shiny egos got a lot of attention in my room.  One student in particular, who I shall dub "Doug," was particularly stubborn with me.

Doug is very bright, but likes avoiding extra work at all costs (fellow teachers, you know the type!)  I had to learn to be very strict with him to make sure he was keeping up with others in class.  Towards the end of the year, we began going over basic algebraic equations.  We reviewed "Please Excuse My Dear Aunt Sally" and all that.  I explained to my students that these sorts of equations are one of my favorite pieces of math.  They are like puzzles you have to solve.  But you have to be very careful how you solve them and be writing down your work as you go.  This is a trouble spot for Doug.  He can often do higher math in his head, though he tends to make silly mistakes because he neglects to write down all the pieces.  So trying to encourage him to write down every step for a simple equations such as "3x + 7= 10" was not happening.  Even writing out the first few exercises on the board was not an incentive.

"Doug, we just did the problem together and you didn't write it down."

"Yes, I did.  See?  I wrote '1.' "

"But you didn't show your work.  I have to see that you know how we got it."

"I did it in my head.  It's easy."

It was a conundrum.  Yes, I am glad he can do it in his head.  Yes, I often let my students work out math problems in various ways if they make sense and work correctly every time.  I really try to allow for different ways of thinking.  But this I have to be a stickler on.  I know what it's like a year down the road with trickier equations.  I know that with operations such as the quadratic formula, if you are not meticulous in writing things down you will make errors every time.  But how can I explain this to him now in a way that won't confuse him or his classmates further? 

"Doug, you just have to trust me on this one.  I know what math is like later on, and if you are not used to writing things out, it will be harder on you."

Boom.

It hits me.  One of those annoyingly enlightening moments where what I am saying to my student I hear God saying directly to me.

A year and a half ago, almost to the day, my world as I knew it fell completely to pieces.  I lost my job, my home, my church (and subsequently my friends), and my husband.  For the past year and a half, God has slowly been putting the pieces back together.  The way my life was headed and how I was living back then were not working.  I was not walking in His will and was headed for serious depression and heartache.  My life now looks leaps and bounds better than it did before, but not all puzzles are in place yet.  There is one piece I know God will put in, but it has not been placed yet.  I ask and pray constantly, "God, I know this is a piece!  Where is it!  You have this for me, can I have it now?  How much longer?"

I hear God gently reply to me, "You are just going to have to trust me on this one.  I know what your life will look like later on down the road.  I have a plan, but you are just going to have to leave it to me and go step by step as I am showing you so you don't make the same mistakes again."

So when I would grade Doug's papers and mark him wrong again and explain again that he needed to write everything out, I breathed deeply and reminded myself to have patience with him, just as my loving Father has patience with me.  I know what the answer may look like, but I need to keep walking, step-by-step, listening to my Teacher show me how it will be done correctly every time.

Even teachers need to learn...

So it has been a long time since I have posted here.  I am now stateside again, and not a day passes that I don't long for the day that I will return to Spanish soil.  Yet while I wait here, God is constantly teaching me new facets of Him and preparing me for the next leg of my journey with Him.

I have considered blogging about lessons that I learn from my students for quite some time now.  I thought about placing these thoughts in a new blog, yet my job is a large part of mi aventura nueva, so here it stays.

My first post will not be about my current class (though Heaven knows I am learning a lot from my current munchkins!)  This is a story from my student teaching days that has had a huge affect on me, and I do not want to forget, as some details have already escaped me.

In my first assignment, I worked in a 1/2 combo class with an amazing cooperating teacher (CT) who treated me as an equal in front of her students.  I am indebted to her care and investment in me, as it shaped me as a teacher very much.  I learned that being gentle, patient, and compassionate with students goes such a long way with students that I should seriously hesitate before taking any other approach with students.

One afternoon after recess, one of the second grade boys, who I will call Andy, came running up to me crying.  When I asked him what was wrong, he told me his best friend, who I will call Jason, had hit him.  This shocked me.  I knew these two boys were close, and if any of the two were to resort to hitting, it would have been Andy, not Jason.  Something was up.  Thanks to the liberation of having two teachers in class, I took the boys to the back table while my CT took care of the rest of the class.  I told them that I was going to let each of them have a chance to talk, and that they needed to listen and not interrupt while the other was speaking.

It turned out that they had been playing baseball, and Andy had made a decision that made Jason feel left out (here the details from my memory are hazy, for which I apologize).  Andy was shocked to hear that his actions had hurt Jason.  He turned to Jason and said, "Jason, I didn't mean to hurt you.  We have been best friends since kindergarten, and I thought you knew that I would never want to hurt you."  Both boys and I started to cry.  That was all that needed to be said.  Jason needed to know he was cared about.  After wiping our tears, the boys were excused to join the rest of the class.  As I stood, I saw tears in my CT's eyes, too. 

I knew that this lesson was for me, too.  How many times have I had arguments with friends and struggled to find the right words to say to them?  Those key words that would bring light and understanding to the situation and would help us both realize what the truth in the situation was?  Sometimes I find them, most times I don't.  But I think of Andy and Jason and how simple it really was: I thought you knew I cared and would never mean to hurt you.  If you didn't know, please be assured that it is true!